Perhaps you are coming across as too nice, too soft, too effeminate, and too submissive to the women you meet. Women are attracted to strong masculine men. Even dominant women.
My husband, for example, is very masculine and dominant in public, at work, with his friends, in his vanilla life, so to speak. If you ever met him, you would never in a million years imagine how different he is in the bedroom with me. He’s like Batman!
He’s submissive in the bedroom with me when I want him to be. And not otherwise. It’s perhaps a little strange for some couples just getting into it to negotiate, just because it’s different. But it all becomes second nature after a while.
My hubby is trained to pay attention and respond to my tone of voice, a certain look I might give him, certain words, a gesture. He’s my PussyBoy when I want him to be, and not otherwise. I control that. I decide when he’s PussyBoy. Otherwise, he’s just the hot handsome dominant masculine man I fell in love with.
Perhaps in your effort to meet a dominant woman you’re too much in PussyBoy mode all the time. That’s not attractive to a woman. You’re trying to top from the bottom. It needs to be her choice; her decision.
What you need to do is look for certain traits in a woman that signal what I call “elegant dominance”. Then you just see and date her as usual. Get to know her. Develop and nurture the relationship. Be honest with her. But don’t push her. Don’t be too obvious about things. Learn the art of subtlety. If she wants a PussyBoy in the bedroom, of she wants to cuckold you, or whatever, that has to be her decision.
Ah, you ask, but how do I let her know that I’m open to that, that I want that? It’s simple. But be subtle.
Take care of her feet. Hold them, keep them warm for her, after a date out when you get home massage them for her, kiss them, lovingly suck on her toes.
Give her lots of oral sex. All the time. Make her cum that way. Turn her over and eat out her ass.
When you have sex, after you ejaculate inside her, go down on her immediately afterwards. Lick out your stuff and make her cum. Making her cum is critical. If she’s not a dominant woman, she will likely feel strange about you doing that. She might even stop you. Just go with whatever she wants. If she stops you, or is uncomfortable, just wait a date or two, then try it again. If she again stops you, then she’s probably not the kind of woman you’re looking for.
But if she is, your doing that sends her important signals. If she’s a dominant woman, she will love you a little more after that night. Do it again the next three or four times you see her. Then the next time, don’t do it. And you will witness something magical happen. She will make you do it.
Depending on her personality, she may be sweet and gentle about it, and just kind of nudge you down, making it clear to you what she wants. Or she may be more direct about it, pushing your head down between her legs and saying something like “you’re not done yet”, or even more directly “I need you to clean me up”.
If she reacts that way, believe me, you gettng the strap-on is not far behind.